Married Life: Seeing a Friend's Divorce on Social Media

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So you know that couple you always see on Facebook and Instagram with the seemingly perfect life? You even know them in person and you've shared great times & happy memories with them too. A concert here or there together, a Halloween night of bar hopping, and the occasional wedding where you wish you were at the same table. My husband and I knew this couple and have those great memories with them. But unfortunately I didn't notice the hashtags on the wife's latest Instagram posts, #onedaystronger #twomonthsstrong #Icangethroughthis and I didn't realize the girl the husband's hands were draped over during the Superbowl was not the wife's. I asked a mutual friend and found out that they were in fact getting a divorce after 4 years and I think I'm still in shock over it. 

Divorce is a part of life and in my opinion you can only hope it's not a part of your future, but it can be a realistic part of someone's life. My husband's parents got a divorce, my aunt & uncle got a divorce, one of the ladies I work closely with got a divorce...it's not anything new to me. But flipping through the Instagram photos and seeing the change take place made me gasp in disbelief. I'm utterly shocked and finding out about this divorce has left me shaken. 

I've been sharing marriage posts with tidbits of Craig and I's weekly discussions, a new issue popping up, or even the wtf situation where I'm hoping someone can relate to me to help us out on it! Craig and I are definitely not perfect and this couple has actually motivated some of those blog posts. In the pictures I saw the marathons on the cold weekend mornings, I saw the ornaments from their travels together, and the wine tours I wish I made the time to do. I wanted to be more like them. I wanted to be more connected like they appeared to be. 

Perhaps I'm so shaken up because I could never have guessed they were having issues from the pictures. They went to our wedding less than a year ago and the smiles they wore were so big. I don't know when things went wrong and I feel bad they couldn't work it out. Maybe I'm so upset because it made divorce a little more real to me. The couple is my age, 30 years old, and were still in the starting their lives together phase. The wife actually wore the same exact wedding dress I did when they had gotten married. 

So what now? I had to write this post because learning about this divorce has affected me greatly. I don't feel that Craig and I are on the way to that path, so please don't think that's the reason why I'm upset. I'm also not going to go on a Stepford wife rampage and try to be the perfect wife now to my husband either. Craig knows this upset me, it shook him up a little too, and it's going to make me love him a little more. Perhaps discuss our issues out loud a little more, make sure we kiss each other goodnight (I always pass out too early) and be thankful & grateful that I'm happy.

Have You Experienced a Friend's Divorce?
Did it Shake You Up A Bit? 

3 comments

  1. I actually had a friend recently write a Facebook post announcing she was getting a divorce and it really took me by surprise. She was the first friend that I know is going through a divorce (not a parent, or aunt or someone older). It is so weird to see someone my age go through that, so I totally get where you're coming from.

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  2. My mom's friend told me that once you go through the stage where everyone in your life is getting married the next stage is where you start seeing lots of people get divorced. It's so sad! Especially so young

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  3. It is sad when friend's go through divorce . . . it will start to happen in your next phase of life. Everyone has kids and then the divorce news occurs. Just stay strong in your marriage and love for each other . . . my single friends all tell me the grass is always greener . . . some wish they had worked harder to stay married. It's not easy, but it's worth it!

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